Monday, April 6, 2009

MARCH MADNESS

The month of March was not kind to me. I had issues with my IC right from the start. After a few months of being able to eat just about anything I wanted, as long as I took the Prelief beforehand, all of a sudden I couldn't eat anything. And I mean ANYTHING that contained a potentially hazardous substance. My morning bowl of Cheerios was no longer my friend. Blueberries also caused problems, and they are one of two fruits (pears being the other) that IC patients are supposed to be able to handle. Caramelized onions on a steak sandwich had me confined to the couch for a weekend. And SITTING for any length of time was causing me a lot of pelvic pain. I would work at my church office 2-3 hours on a Friday morning, and spend the weekend on the couch, drinking marshmallow root tea and praying for some ease of symptoms..

Needless to say, I was distraught. Crying. Depressed. Thinking that if this was how the rest of my life was going to be, I would just as soon have it over with. Going out to dinner was a weekly enjoyment....and now it is becoming an impossibility. Cooking has become a chore instead of a pleasure, as my favorite spices aren't allowed, no tomato products, no onions....no JOHNNY'S SEASONING and EVERYTHING needs to be prepared from scratch. Can't handle those preservatives and ascorbic acid that are in almost all foods. I don't remember when I last had chocolate.....or coffee....or spaghetti...or an orange....

Working at my desk, sewing, even riding in a car....all cause pelvic pain. If I exercised, I'd have to give it up (grin)....other than some slow walking or yoga. Sretching is good. I am going to get back on my pilates machine and slowly see if I can get back to doing that.

While I was in the midst of the worst week ever in early March, I got a notice from the courts that I was selected for jury duty for April. I groaned at the mere thought of having to do something like that. It just wasn't possible. Fortunately my urologist agreed with me and sent a letter to the court excusing me permanently from jury service. Permanently. Permanently, because this disease, this condition, is not going to go away. So while I was very pleased that jury duty was not going to be a part of my future, it also put a stamp on the rest of my life.....INVALID.

Want to go out to dinner this Saturday? I don't think so. Hey, want to take a week and drive to Montana? Right. How about going out to the winery and watching them bottle this weekend? Afraid I can't. Going to stay for potluck today? Um, no. I could go on and on, but you get the idea.

Okay...March is over, and it's now April, and I'm doing better. I'm not sure what set off the downward spiral last month, but I'm trying real hard to avoid a recurrence. I've resigned myself to the food issues, but am struggling with the other things that are causing discomfort. I try to spread my church work over the week so that I'm not there for long periods of time. I may have to take up applique quilting instead of pieced so there's less time at the machine. Still haven't figured out how to handle a road trip, but I'm working on it.

This is all new to me. I'm learning as I go. I apologize for sounding grumpy, and I hope you'll bear with me when I have to say "No" to the simplest requests. I'm working on keeping a good attitude, and trying to be positive, but some days, it's just not gonna happen.

3 comments:

ELIZABETH said...

Hugs Kathleen.
Staying positive is good but we all know that some days a good old grumble helps to get us through.

Hope things improve and that you find ways to cope and don't have to give up all the things you love.

Anonymous said...

Man, this really sucks! (Can I say that on here?) I'm really sorry for you. I'm going to be praying, a lot, and asking God to heal you completely of this. Love you!
tlc

Anonymous said...

Man, I agree. Ditto! Ditto!
If it makes you feel any better, I have shingles. Not that that would make you feel better, but just know, a lot of us have issues.
Love You too!
lab