The gals on The View this morning were talking about having/not having children. Apparently more and more people are deciding not to have kids these days, and the general consensus is that these people are more "selfish" than those who have chosen to have kids.
If you don't already know it, I don't have children. I helped raise two teenage boys with my previous husband, tho I use the term "raised" rather generally. These boys were allowed to raise themselves, with no input allowed from me, as daddy didn't ever want them to choose to live with mom instead of him. Discipline was handed out on rare occasions, when the act screamed for parental intervention, but most of the time nothing they did was bad enough for corrective measures to be taken (in their father's opinion). The oldest of these boys is now 45, and still behaving like a spoiled teenager. The other is 42, and the total opposite of his brother. He is an excellent example for someone becoming a fine, responsible adult, in spite of the people who brought him up.
I have never felt the urge to become a mom. Never. I don't know why. It's not something I can remember ever wanting to do. I had lots of baby dolls, and played with them constantly. It just didn't translate into adult life. I don't THINK I'm particularly selfish. I don't spend lots of monies on toys for myself, or traveling....both suggestions as reasons not to have children. I see myself now as feeling like a grandparent....it's wonderful to be around the kiddies for a bit, but great to send them home with the folks.
I absolutely adore my favorite 12-year-old, and she has tugged at my heart strings in ways that must somewhat mimic what a mother feels for her child.....tho I'm sure on a much lesser scale. Don't want to offend any moms out there! But I love her....I care about what happens to her...and being around her is one of my greatest joys. She is this amazing person and I love watching her evolve into the person she's meant to be. So, I guess I'm not totally without a maternal feeling or two.
Maybe if I'd met Michael first, and we'd married when we were young, we'd have kids. I'm sure of it. A houseful probably. So there you go. I just didn't meet the right man at the right time. And how fortunate for me that I don't miss having children, and neither does he.